I'd make it run full speed whenever the loco is "on" just because power on dcc is not usually a problem. I don't think paralleling with the motor is the best way, you can load the motor at lower voltages, and the fan might be going too slow. A function output that is on whenever the loco is moving might be ok, but would shut the fan off even if you just finished a very hard pull.
Regards, Greg
Regards, Greg